Tuesday we're focusing on how writers use grammar, spelling, and other English language conventions in their MCAS compositions.
Click here to read an essay with proficient use of grammar, spelling, and other conventions.
Click here to read an essay that needs improvement in its use of grammar, spelling, and other conventions.
Click here to read an essay that fails to use appropriate grammar, spelling, and other conventions.
In the comment box below answer these two questions.
1. What are some differences between the proficient and needs improvement responses?
2. What are some differences between the needs improvement and failing responses?
Click here to read the prompt for last year's MCAS composition.
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Monday we focused on how writers develop ideas in response to an MCAS composition prompt.
We'll start by figuring out the difference between effective and ineffective responses.
Click here to read a proficient response to the prompt.
Click here to read a response that needs improvement.
Click here to read a failing response.
In the comment box below answer these two questions.
1. What are some differences between the proficient and needs improvement responses?
2. What are some differences between the needs improvement and failing responses?
In your answers you should mention how focused the responses are, how organized the responses are, how thoroughly developed the responses are, how well details are incorporated into the response.
the proficient response is longer and its worded out better. They wrote way more and explained it using details. The needs improvement response is okay but it needs a little more details from the concerpt. The failing response is to small and it barely explained anything. You wouldnt be able to learn anything.
ReplyDeleteThe difference between proficient and needs improvement is one of them has a lot of detail to it and the other one has not that much. The difference between needs improvement and failing is failing only had 1 paragraph with not that much detail about the subject.
ReplyDelete1.) The differences between the proficient, and needs improvement responses are that the proficient is a lot longer. Also the proficient restated the question in the beginning, and went into detail answering it.
ReplyDelete2.) The differences between the needs improvement, and failing responses are that the failing response wasn't even 5 paragraphs. Plus it was just saying how Voldemort was strong, evil, and that wasn't good for him in the end. It didn't really answer the question that well in detail.
1. The differences between proficient and needs improvement, to get a proficient score you have to give a good amount of detail, and you have to show that you understand the open response. To get a needs improvement score you have to give little detail, and kinda understanding the open response.
ReplyDelete2. The difference understand the between needs improvement and failing responses is to get a needs improvement score is to kinda understand the concept of the open response. To get a failing response you have to understand very little out of the whole thing
the proficient is not to long but it does has good wording. they explained it well. the improvment response is fine. the failing response dosent tell u anything. i dont think anyone is going to learn anything from that.
ReplyDeletethe difference between failing and passing was that the kid that passed did a good job by answering the question an meeting the prompt. he should alot of detail. the kid that failed only wrote 1 paragraph and did not do anything. he did not show enough detail and did not meet the promp.
ReplyDeletethe needs improvement essay is terrible the ideas are not organized not enough supporting details also the topic is not explained thoroughly enough. and you dont see any of these problems in the proficient essay
ReplyDelete2. the failing essay has the same problems except its also grammatically incorrect and organized even worse than the needs improvement
1. The proficient response has neater hand writing, better vocabulary, and is longer.
ReplyDelete2. The needs improvement response is longer than the failing response. The failing response didn't properly answer the question.
the difference between needs improvement and the failing response. The failing response was running low on ways to make new sentences so they stretched the sentences to make them fit the 5 sentence goal. and simplistic words. The needs imrovement innovates in some ways but still uses simplistic words and stretched sentences But uses enough evidence to convey a main idea. Needs improvement to proficient. Proficient uses a good vocabulary and tons of information about the book they were reading. Also the sentences weren't repetative like the previous grades.
ReplyDeleteThe proficient response was meatier and made more cents.(even tho i don't make no cents, i make dollars.but that's besides the fact). The needs improvement was bony.
ReplyDeleteIt didn't answer the prompt of writing as well as the proficient one. The proficient was also more certificated than the needs improvement. And that's why we eat alligators on presidents day.
1.) The proficient has way more detail than the needs improvement. To get a proficient you need to give more information, and good detail, and you need to show how you understand the open response.
ReplyDelete2.) The needs improvement is different from the failing because the needs improvement shows a little more understanding than the failing essay. Both of these essays seem like they didn't clearly understand the concept.
the needs improvement essay has bad word usage and terrible sentence format but still shows a general understanding the failing essay was way to short grammatically incorrect and horrible spelling mistakes.
ReplyDeleteThe proficient one had no mistakes on it, and the needs improvement could be a little better. The failing one only had like 2 sentences and didnt put any commas or apostraphies
ReplyDelete1. The proficient response has good spelling, grammar and sentence structure.
ReplyDelete2. The failing response has bad grammar, spelling and punctuation.
in the proficient one, the equity of the wording is a lot better then the other ones(ones isnt a word i use a lot because i make 20s) but even though i make a lot of money that doesnt mean i can do bad on the mcas. the failing 20(one) had no good words or commas or anything. the needs improvement writing didnt have as much words as proficient
ReplyDelete1. the difference between proficient and needs improvement is the the proficient had very little spelling and pronunciation errors, to get a needs improvement you have to spell more than a couple spelling errors. The difference between needs improvement and failure is that to get a failure score you have to spell more than 10 words or pronunciation wrong, and to get a needs improvement grade you have to get more than a couple words spelled wrong
ReplyDeletethe proficient one was good because it knew how do use all the apostrophes and comas and he really did good.the needs improovment was not bad but it was missing some commas and that he had alot of uppercase letters in the middl of the sentence. the failing one was awful.
ReplyDeleteThe proficient response was better than the needs improvement because the proficient had all its punctuation marks. It also answered the question right compared to the needs improvement. The needs improvement response was less fat compared to the proficient, meaning the proficient had a full house and the needs improvement had a flush. Now that's why we eat candy on labor day.
ReplyDeleteThe proficient response has good spelling, grammar and sentence structure.
ReplyDeleteThe failing response has bad grammar, spelling and punctuation. but that really dosent matter unless you understand what they are saying
1.) The grammar in the proficient was much clearer than the needs improvement. In the proficient i could follow what the writer was saying, and in the needs improvement it was harder to follow and understand what they were talking about.
ReplyDelete2.) The grammar in the needs improvement was better than the failing. In the failing it was hard to follow, and I was even lost at some points. In the needs improvement the grammar was still off, but not as bad as the failure.
PS: I see you Mr. Cook your wipeing down the board and makin money woooooooo!!!!1!
ReplyDeleteBrendan McCarthy
ReplyDeleteThe failing response showed little detail about the book had horrible spelling it's Macbeth not mcbeth. The needs improvement response showed more information enough to display a main idea of the character they chose to write about but had some spelling errors and grammar errors but leagues better than failing. the proficient response had no errors (I didn't see any) conveyed a good main idea and info about a character they wrote about improved on needs improvement in every way.